Saturday, September 6, 2008

The Blue-Green Chronicles - Part 1

The Test

When I was in high school, a personality test was administered. For the life of me, I cannot recollect why I had to take this test. I seem to recall it happened in an English class, but maybe my school counselor was the proctor. Truth is, I think I have blocked out parts of this experience, because the results were ominous.

--I have a blue-green split personality--

Okay, what the hell does that mean? In this exam, colors were used on a graph for the purpose of grouping traits. Oddly, my test scored in the extremes of both blue and green. This woman (my counselor? English teacher?) was shocked to see this result ("most rare" she said) and looked incredibly concerned for my well being. I don't remember all the fine details, but I do know that my blue score indicated heightened, almost psychic intuition. My green score indicated highly analytical thinking, almost extremist in its scientific "data-only please" methodology. This meant that my life would be filled with internal conflicts, often crippling - for my intuitive awareness would use a metaphor-seeking and ever-changing lens through which to view the world; my analytical grounded eye would seek black and white results with clear data based evidence to shape reality.

The look this woman gave me said, "you're fucked".

I think such tests, along with IQ tests are given far too much weight. I once scored low enough on an IQ test to be classified "Mentally Retarded" and then again on another to be classified "Genius". Maybe I'm a Retarded-Genius split personality. I digress. Though I question any test's value, this one proved prophetic indeed. And I have to wonder, was it truly prophetic, or did that look from this woman plant a seed that sprouted into what has oft been a troubled reality?

In a series of blogs, I'm going to investigate this blue-green dilemma. Read or ignore - but they're coming.

The Blue-Green Chronicles

No comments: